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Blogs > nerdygirl721 > Full disclosure

Just call me Cautious Carol
 

Heathen_G 65M
7974 posts
12/16/2016 7:47 pm

 I just wanted a fuck. .. That isn't immature. A person just wants to fuck, they go to a sex site. Makes perfect sense.

It was Dick R Us for me and while there is nothing wrong with sex, it’s treating people like objects that’s not right. .... It's not wrong either. When a person is on this site, instead of on Match or eharmony [29 dimensions of compatibility], then being sexually objectified, is perfectly reasonable on here.

So now I’m actively working on not just focusing on just a fuck and focus now on the person. .. You can do that, but you would also be making yourself more vulnerable to getting hurt. Why? Because this is a sex site. Unless he is a perfect loser, he would be getting sexual attention from other women. Even worse, if you're trying to non-objectify women.

While I do try to treat everyone in a respectful manner, I can try harder. .... Don't beat yourself up. They are all grown up, they know where they are, they know how to read.

They can treat you with respect by acknowledging you're on this site for sex.


nerdygirl721 34F  
1176 posts
12/17/2016 3:21 am
    Quoting Heathen_G:
    I just wanted a fuck. .. That isn't immature. A person just wants to fuck, they go to a sex site. Makes perfect sense.

    It was Dick R Us for me and while there is nothing wrong with sex, it’s treating people like objects that’s not right. .... It's not wrong either. When a person is on this site, instead of on Match or eharmony [29 dimensions of compatibility], then being sexually objectified, is perfectly reasonable on here.

    So now I’m actively working on not just focusing on just a fuck and focus now on the person. .. You can do that, but you would also be making yourself more vulnerable to getting hurt. Why? Because this is a sex site. Unless he is a perfect loser, he would be getting sexual attention from other women. Even worse, if you're trying to non-objectify women.

    While I do try to treat everyone in a respectful manner, I can try harder. .... Don't beat yourself up. They are all grown up, they know where they are, they know how to read.

    They can treat you with respect by acknowledging you're on this site for sex.
People don't like to be treated as a walking dildo. Just like I wouldn't want to be treated like a cum dumpster. I still do not want a committed relationship, but I do want a Fwb. I dont get emotionally attached and I'm not possessive.

Even though, we are on an sex site does not mean I should objectify anyone. You are very harsh, at times, but you are never abusive. In fact, I think you are very intelligent and funny.

There are those who feel they can dehumanize others and it can turn into abusive language or other negative actions. There should be at least be a basic respect for another person.


nerdygirl721 34F  
1176 posts
12/17/2016 3:28 am
    Quoting cs1df2:
    ...you're back

    On a separate note, I will however counter your statement about bad apples, as I've learned one can very easily spoil the whole bunch -- at least if the bad one isn't quickly isolated and/or thrown far, far away

    Oh yeah, and if you're going by Cautious Carol can I be Paranoid Pete? ......mostly because I can't say that I'm interested in being a Dick R Us products - for anyone -- despite the social acceptance and (I'd say) expectation that guys should want to be a dildo for whoever is wanting to use him as such. (call me crazy, but I think it'd be a lot more fun to snuggle up with someone where there's mutual respect for each other as human beings)
Hey, Paranoid Pete. And I know that it is wrong to look at anyone as an object. Much better to just share a snuggle.


nerdygirl721 34F  
1176 posts
12/17/2016 3:28 am
    Quoting Caele:
    Yea for your positive return! GG. Don't let 'em grind ya down.
I won't


Heathen_G 65M
7974 posts
12/17/2016 4:50 am

 People don't like to be treated as a walking dildo. ... Then they came to the wrong kind of dating site. Totally appropriate behavior , here, on this kind of site, to tell a person, "Hey I just want to fuck". [If mutually inclined, you both take necessary steps to make that happen].

If you, telling them that, breaks their heart, remind them what site they are on.

Just like I wouldn't want to be treated like a cum dumpster. ... Then you too, are likely putting too much emotional emphasis [expecting too much] on the results you'll get from this kind of site.

I still do not want a committed relationship, but I do want a Fwb. I dont get emotionally attached and I'm not possessive. ... That's fine, but you're still going to find males who just want a cum dumpster , because that's what they want. That's an appropriate "Want" from this place. You can't fault them for that.
Better they are here, instead of eharmony. That attitude wouldn't fly over there.

Even though, we are on an sex site does not mean I should objectify anyone. .... Doesn't mean you shouldn't/can't, either. If you're going to sexually objectify people, this is the appropriate site to do it.

You are very harsh, at times, but you are never abusive. In fact, I think you are very intelligent and funny. .... Thank you.

There are those who feel they can dehumanize others and it can turn into abusive language or other negative actions. .... What is considered dehumanizing, or abusive language, and even negative actions, can be a very subjective call.
On this site , anyone , by their own free will, joining this site, should be sharp enough to understand this isn't a MaryPoppins vanilla site.


There should be at least be a basic respect for another person. ... Accordingly, sure. But respect the site. Respect the type of people you're extremely likely to find on a site like this, looking for what they want.

If you go into the deep jungles of South America, you respect the critters who thrive there.


nerdygirl721 34F  
1176 posts
12/17/2016 8:10 am
    Quoting Heathen_G:
    People don't like to be treated as a walking dildo. ... Then they came to the wrong kind of dating site. Totally appropriate behavior , here, on this kind of site, to tell a person, "Hey I just want to fuck". [If mutually inclined, you both take necessary steps to make that happen].

    If you, telling them that, breaks their heart, remind them what site they are on.

    Just like I wouldn't want to be treated like a cum dumpster. ... Then you too, are likely putting too much emotional emphasis [expecting too much] on the results you'll get from this kind of site.

    I still do not want a committed relationship, but I do want a Fwb. I dont get emotionally attached and I'm not possessive. ... That's fine, but you're still going to find males who just want a cum dumpster , because that's what they want. That's an appropriate "Want" from this place. You can't fault them for that.
    Better they are here, instead of eharmony. That attitude wouldn't fly over there.

    Even though, we are on an sex site does not mean I should objectify anyone. .... Doesn't mean you shouldn't/can't, either. If you're going to sexually objectify people, this is the appropriate site to do it.

    You are very harsh, at times, but you are never abusive. In fact, I think you are very intelligent and funny. .... Thank you.

    There are those who feel they can dehumanize others and it can turn into abusive language or other negative actions. .... What is considered dehumanizing, or abusive language, and even negative actions, can be a very subjective call.
    On this site , anyone , by their own free will, joining this site, should be sharp enough to understand this isn't a MaryPoppins vanilla site.


    There should be at least be a basic respect for another person. ... Accordingly, sure. But respect the site. Respect the type of people you're extremely likely to find on a site like this, looking for what they want.

    If you go into the deep jungles of South America, you respect the critters who thrive there.
While I don't put too much or any emphasis on the emotional aspect, I still want sane, safe and consensual sex. I'm not looking for an vanilla guy, I'm looking for a fuck. I do agree with you. It's just hard to say what I really want to without actually saying it. And that's where I think the confusion is from. But since I can't, as of yet talk or blog about it with others, I did blog about what I personally learned and how my perspective has changed from my experience.


Heathen_G 65M
7974 posts
12/17/2016 4:34 pm

 While I don't put too much or any emphasis on the emotional aspect, I still want sane, safe and consensual sex. ... You can still do that , and perceive him as a sex object. It's like a business transaction. Each wants an amicable deal. If a man is getting all weepy because you just want to hit-it and run, then you should back off and find another. He's on the wrong site.

I'm not looking for an vanilla guy, I'm looking for a fuck. ... Yes, and you're on a good site to find that. Make good use of other fuck sites , too.

I do agree with you. It's just hard to say what I really want to without actually saying it. And that's where I think the confusion is from. ... "Bluntness" is the best policy.

But since I can't, as of yet talk or blog about it with others, .... Then don't. Not with your current profile.
Instead set up a different profile, one that isn't actively participating in these gossip rags, and with a more mysterious picture [unidentifiable]. Then state bluntly what you want within that profile. Then never use that profile to interact with the "Community" here, on any venue.

I did blog about what I personally learned and how my perspective has changed from my experience. .... Yes, you did, and now you have a bunch of followers, on this profile you're using.

Make another one, and exercise more discreetness. Target only those whom you believe you'd have a good chance of meeting up to see if a good fucking is likely.


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